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Verbal Diarrhea

January 16, 2011

There is a disease that is affecting some of the people that leave comments on this blog, particularly 2 gentlemen from the country of South Africa.

It’s called verbal diarrhea.

Verbal diarrhea can be defined in a variety of ways, such as:

• The non-stop flow of words, namely verbs, from the sufferer’s mouth.

• A serious disease which, once it has control of a person, causes them to spew forth incoherent babble from the bowels of the voicebox. Often extremely frustrating for the observer.

• a chronic inability to say something in less than a page when one sentence would suffice.

• The spouting of a person who cannot control his random thoughts from exploding.

• What happens when someone speaks their mind without any filter; the consequences can be profoundly funny or insulting to the person listening

• uncontrollable crap that people say

• The frequent and excessive auditable discharge of the mouth producing abnormally thin and diluted substance.

• talking too much and saying little of value; usually the symptom of ignorance or lack of relevant input.

Another term for verbal diarrhea is logorrhea or logorrhea. The spoken form of logorrhoea is a kind of verbosity which uses superfluous (or fancy) words to disguise an otherwise useless message as useful or intellectual. The utterer is colloquially called a “motor mouth”. Some partial and complete synonyms include “bloviation”, “tumidity”, and “wordiness”. The term is also sometimes less precisely applied to unnecessarily (and often redundant) wordy speech in general; this is more usually referred to as “prolixity”.

Some examples:

I really think you are cool and think about you all the time. I actually think about you 24/7 and what our children will look like even their names.

Meaning: You’re hot

The individual member of the social community often receives his information via visual, symbolic channels.

Meaning: People read

The medical community indicates that a program of downsizing average total daily caloric intake is maximally efficacious in the field of proactive weight-reduction methodologies.

Meaning: Doctors think the best way to lose weight is to eat less

Symptoms of verbal diarrhea include: constant talking about irrelevant subjects; having no friends; slow realisation that your own stomach is digesting you; having no friends; rejection from society; disownment by your parents; and having no friends. In Pokémon: The Official Trading Card Game, any Pokémon with verbal diarrhea loses -3 attack points.

Tragically, there is no cure for this disease, apart from severely traumatizing the sufferer. There are, however, several ways of suppressing the symptoms, such as applying sudden force onto the victim’s nasal area. Other ways include pushing the victim under a bus; slapping the victim until the victim’s head explodes; shoving a sock in their mouth; verbally abusing victim; or simply using duct tape.

I have tried verbally abusing them as suggested by one psychologist but this did not work. My current method of treatment is to limit the offenders to a maximum of one paragraph per day.

I was tempted to use duct tape but we’ll try this and see what happens.

  1. onetimewasthere
    January 16, 2011 at 5:35 pm

    Wow – that’s a lot on the subject. I hope it won’t dissuade Mr Madiba from contributing as I think his posts were becoming much more concise and he was even beginning to show a bit of a sense of humor. I believe he could actually provide a worthwhile perspective. I realize this is your blog and you can take this in whatever direction you wish. I’m am not so inspired to write my own. The core subject seems to be why would people follow a man who appears to have been involved in a serious cover up from not just a moral perspective but likely a criminal one as well. That and apparently other financial issues. I find it interesting to read both sides of the issue not so much to know personal details but just the overall topic of leadership and followers and how one uses or chooses not to use his or her own reasoning when faced with what most would consider strong evidence that one had been seriously mislead. At the risk of showing symptoms of the disease you describe, I leave it at that, but just to encourage you not to be too harsh on supporters of Mr Byskal as it would be really interesting to try to understand why people have such unwavering support in spite of what has been presented.

    • January 16, 2011 at 7:42 pm

      I don’t mind opposite points of view but the rambling was really getting to me. I couldn’t even read everything they said.

      So I have not banned them. I have just limited them to one paragraph a day. I am hoping that works and, surprisingly, it seems to be.

  2. January 17, 2011 at 4:17 am

    Good Day,

    You have blocked us as some of comments are not published. I will send you a link to our blog where we are free to air our views. Unlike here where a Hittler mentality exists….

    • January 19, 2011 at 12:45 pm

      I will not post your 5 page comments. Go back and read my blog above. You suffer greatly from this disease.

      You get one paragraph a day. And if you are being very succinct and cogent (very important English words), I may relax things and allow you to post more. BUT only if you are being interesting.

      You take 3 paragraphs to say what most people can say in 1 or 2 sentences.

  3. rita
    January 17, 2011 at 5:24 pm

    I think the real reason is you have limited mental compacity…these people provide a different perspective but you are not able to mentally process their reasoning therefore you choose to block them so …others would think you actually have something to say! Not everyone is willing to listen to a person who hide his/her identity. Open you mind dialog with others you might really learn something.

  4. rita
    January 19, 2011 at 12:49 pm

    Shame on you girl…it did not take me long to figure you out…sins are going to fine you out.

  5. InGodWeTrust..All OthersPayCash
    January 19, 2011 at 3:08 pm

    Hey Rita… you’re nuts aren’t you? Maybe get back into the kitchen and make some cookies or something useful. Fold some laundry. Scrub a toilet. Do what you are good at… and do it to the best of your “ability”…which is NOT posting on blogs! Oh and check your spelling… it’s really lousy! You probably talk like “Goofy” too don’t you? Hyuck hyuck!

  6. rita
    January 20, 2011 at 4:02 pm

    getting hot and bothered again? I thought you are a christian on his way to heaven at all cost. What are you doing crossdressing than spreading hate?

  7. InGodWeTrust..All OthersPayCash
    January 20, 2011 at 7:39 pm

    Hahahahahah cross dressing and spreading hate? hahaha The way you use the “engrish ranguage” I’m not entirely sure how you even mean that or if you know what you are even talking about. Naw… I’m not hot and bothered… takes more than something that evolved from an ape like yourself to get me hot and bothered…and I’ve never been into primates anyways!

    • onetimewasthere
      January 21, 2011 at 2:36 pm

      You are a bit harsh. However, out of curiousity I checked the tribute to Ed Byskal blog. I found a comment from Rita to be quite interesting. Apparently, TSanning is editing Rita’s comments on this (TSanning’s) blog so that it looks like she can’t spell. However, I guess Mr Batsi must be doing the same thing on that blog as Rita’s comments are riddled with both spelling and grammar errors there as well. I have no issue with Rita – have no idea who she is and I am sure that someone could find grammarical errors in my writing as well. I just think it’s sad that she would accuse Ms Sanning of sabotaging her writing, when in fact Rita is doing that all on her own. This blog has become much more interesting to me now that we have such funny contributors. I realize the original subject matter was not intended to be entertaining, but the back and forth between you and Rita definitely makes it fun to read.

      • January 21, 2011 at 3:01 pm

        I have not edited any of Rita’s comments to make her look like she can’t spell. The bad spelling you see is her own.

        If she is making a statement to the contrary then she is lying and I will ban her from this site.

        I have removed the personal names, email and other information that she posted which I consider completely inappropriate.

        If you think it appropriate to post personal information (something which I am not even doing for some of the people accused of inappropriate behavior in the elders letter), then we are in disagreement.

      • January 21, 2011 at 3:15 pm

        The comments might be judged as harsh if Rita had not:

        1. Called me uneducated
        2. Stated that I had “limited mental capacity”
        3. Used foul language.

        When your attack is harsh, a harsh response may be the only way to get the person’s attention, as limited as that might be.

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